Whom to Obey in Nikah — the Father or the Mother?

Question

A man abandoned his wife completely. The wife brought up her daughter and son. When the son grew up, the father says: “I will marry you into a good family.” If the son marries elsewhere at the father’s word, there is a fear of separation from the mother. Whose word should the son heed now?

Answer

The son should not take revenge for the violation of rights the father committed; rather, he should obey his father and marry as his father says, and then continue serving his mother as well, without falling short in her rights. If the father forbids that, obeying the father in this is not binding (lazim); rather, kindness and sympathy towards the mother are always binding.

Source: Fatawa Mahmudiyya

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